In the Christian faith, we like to label the dos and don’ts in life as black and white. While scripture is very clear on many practices, some are left up to individual decision and personal conviction.

Through the years, multiple (and even some oppositional) views have emerged on whether or not those of the Christian faith should ever seek or accept professional counseling.

Popular Christian Views on Professional Counseling

1. On one end of the spectrum are those who fully embrace professional counseling and the concepts of psychology. They view it as a science and believe psychological practices hold validity as part of modern medicine.
2. On the other end are those who feel professional counseling is based on secular concepts and therefore is anti-Christian by nature. Subsequently, they believe it should be avoided. This group often prescribes prayer and scripture reading as the only medicine needed to resolve personal issues.
3. Between these two views are a wide range of other approaches including, but not limited to: Christian Counseling, Biblical Counseling, Nouthetic Counseling, Theophostic Prayer, and a host of other healing modalities.

Disclaimer: The purpose of this article is not to discuss the points of each previously stated belief. Rather, I wish to share my journey to becoming a professional Christian counselor with you. In the end, each of us makes the decision on where, how and to whom we turn to for help.

My Journey from Anti-Counseling to Licensed Therapist  

Like some of you, I was raised believing that counseling was something that “others” did, but not “Christians.” I was taught that everything about professional counseling should be avoided. Because of its use of secular psychology I believed it was anti-God. Not to make light of the situation, but it reminds me of Bobby Boucher’s mom from The Water Boy (“counseling’s from the devil”). I was told people only need prayer and the reading of the Word to find life’s answers.

Believe me, the irony that I am now a professional therapist is not lost on me.

My story began in the spring of 2007, when my late-wife was involved in a major vehicle accident, from which she never fully recovered. The force of the collision was so severe that her front, driver-side tire was forced directly under her driver’s seat. It took the fire department 45 minutes to cut her free from the dashboard.

Besides the obvious physical injuries she sustained, she was left with a profound case of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Her PTSD showed itself with horrible nightmares in which she would awaken screaming and thinking she was back in her car and trapped. Along with a slew of other issues, any sounds of siren or breaking glass could trigger a full-blown panic attack that would leave her incapacitated.

As part of her recovery, it was recommended she enter counseling to help her process her trauma.

Having seen the impact PTSD was having on her life, I would have tried anything to help my wife find some relief. One of the counselors she met with used a form of exposure therapy on her, a process that involves reliving the event over and over again. The idea behind the method is that, over time, one would become desensitized to the event and no longer become triggered.

While this method has shown success in some people, there are others that it drives further into their symptoms. My wife was the latter. After a year of “desensitizing” treatment she was worse than when she started. To compound the situation, she had a mile-long list of medical issues related to her injuries and had developed an addiction to the opioid painkillers she used to manage her tremendous physical pain. She would also self medicate with alcohol in an attempt to stop both the physical pain and nightmares. Despite the efforts of so many, none of us could save her. In May of 2010, nearly three years to the day after her accident, my wife passed away from an alcohol and prescription medication overdose.

Tragically, nothing we tried had really ever helped her.

Looking back, I can’t help but believe we lost her in her endless attempts to gain back a life and a body that no longer was there.

Despite all the counseling, there was an inability to find a new life of meaning and purpose. Her life and her body were different now. But, different doesn’t necessarily mean worse. Different just means you need to find a new purpose and meaning apart from what you once had.

I believe there was a wide gulf separating her Christian faith from the secular counseling she received. You see, because her injuries were the result of a work-related accident, my wife was placed into the workers compensation system. Trying to find a faith-based counselor wasn’t an option in that system.

Feeding the Spiritual AND Counseling Needs

In the end, the people at our church couldn’t help her. They cared, but were ill equipped to grasp the severity of the situation. Her counselor couldn’t fully help her. He was ill equipped to meet her spiritual needs. Our family was ultimately left unsupported, not out of a lack of compassion, but out of not knowing what we needed. As a result, I’ve become painfully aware of the need that exists for a bridge between professional secular counseling and one’s own personal faith in God.

When faced with picking up the pieces of my own shattered life, I decided I would work to be that bridge. I didn’t want anyone else to lose a wife, husband, child, brother, sister, friend, or neighbor in the way that I had. As the person some might view as least likely, I went back to college at age 48 to finish my undergraduate degree. I then enrolled in graduate school and studied clinical psychology with plans to become a licensed counselor. Upon graduating, I started a three-year internship and then finally sat for my state licensure exams.

My journey from anti-counseling believer to Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist is a story you would have to live in order to truly understand.

Don’t get me wrong, I still have strong feelings on some aspects of counseling that I believe to be negative (mostly theories that encourage people to see themselves as victims rather than victors).

Despite these negatives, I see a desperate need for well-trained believers to come alongside people in crisis. Individuals who can help people explore and process their life problems in light of their personal faith in God. It’s not because God’s not enough…He is all sufficient. But, He also equips us with gifts, talents, and skills to help one another through our lives on this Earth. Trained believers can point people toward healing. This is where I believe professional Christian counselors can help in the healing process.

Professional Christian counselors fill an important role by providing culturally sensitive help and support for Christian individuals, couples, and families. Often when a Christian seeks secular counseling for help, they report feeling neither fully understood or supported because of their Christian worldview. To put it plainly, secular counselors lack the indwelling spirit of God and awareness that can only come from a living relationship with Jesus Christ.

Another big issue I’ve come across related to Christian counseling is that there are many counselors who say they are Christian, but there are not many who call themselves Christian Counselors. Few have the biblical training and experience to help people understand their own individual relationship with God in the midst of their despair.

I work with Christians daily who tell me they weren’t able to connect with their last counselor because he/she didn’t believe there was a God, let alone believe in Him. I can’t help but wonder how many Christians go to a secular counselor only to have their faith dismissed? Or worse, lose their faith during the counseling process?

Today, years after my late wife’s death, I am a State Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist working in private practice. I have a new life of meaning and purpose! I have answered a call to help others journey to the other side of their own difficulties…a side of healing and mending.

As a Christian counselor, it’s not my job to play Holy Spirit, or even give advice. I see the role of a Christian counselor as supporting and helping individuals to understand that life’s pains are the vehicle God uses to grow us and take us to places we would never take ourselves. Helping people to find a new identity that moves them from where they are to where they want to be, is how I bring meaning to my own life of loss. It brings good from the bad and healing from the hurt. God has a plan for each of our lives, despite our own idea of what we think our life needs to look like. God is able to write a new story, if we will let Him.

So, I go back to my original question: Should Christians ever seek professional counseling? Each of us is our own free moral agent and will have to answer that question, like so many other questions in our lives.

But for me, I find it a privilege to be that bridge between the two sides of the issue. It’s my honor to support people, where they are, and to help them find their own way by supporting their unique and personal expression of faith as it lives out in their lives.

If you find yourself on that journey today or someday, prayerfully consider your options and decide what’s best for you.

Blessings,

-Joel Walton