I watched a video interview recently with an elderly man turning 100 years old. The reporter asked him what his secret to aging was and had him reflect on his life over the last century. (By the way, he said his secret was eating lots of candy – but the jury’s still out on that one.)
We love nostalgia and talking about “the good ole days.” There’s something powerful about looking back and reflecting on what we’ve been through, what we’ve learned, and who we’ve loved. Well, ‘tis the season for looking back. Later this month, television shows will inevitably feature specials on the biggest headlines of 2018 or run tributes to celebrities who have passed away, and radio stations will recap the music which topped the charts this year.
As we come to the end of our calendars, will you choose to look back? Will you be reflecting on your life during 2018 or blindly plowing forward into 2019? Some may say you can’t move forward if you’re too busy looking backward, but I have to disagree. If you want to grow and succeed in 2019, I recommend you spend some time thinking about how you spent your 2018.
Why Taking a Look Back is Helpful for Moving Forward
They say hindsight is 20/20 and I have to agree. It seems we have better clarity of a situation after it occurs rather than while we’re still wading the waters. Here are a few reasons why looking back can help you move forward.
- We see our growth.
Remember going to a family reunion or wedding and your great aunt squeezing your cheeks and talking about how big you’ve gotten? (I think my cheeks still hurt from that!) When you only see someone once in a while, it is easy to see how much they’ve grown. However, when you’re standing in front of the mirror every day, it’s not as easy to see.
Reflecting on your last year is similar. When you’re going through the motions of daily life, you don’t have the same perspective as you do when you take step back from it. Maybe you’ve developed better money habits, been a more loving spouse or patient parent, or maybe your faith has grown through some hardship. It’s hard to measure your daily progress, but easy to see the change over a year’s time. You will see just how far you’ve come, rather than feeling discouraged by how far you have left to go. And seeing the progress you have made will serve as fuel for your forward motion!
- We learn appreciation.
Taking inventory of your last 365 days, is there something or someone you took for granted? Perhaps someone played an integral part of your 2018 and you want to move into 2019 by showing them just how important they are to you. As you replay the highlight reel in your mind (or in conversation with someone else), take note of the people and things you’re truly grateful for and share that gratitude with them.
Embracing nostalgia over the good times with loved ones you’ve had can bring you immense joy and make you feel more connected to your loved ones. This is turn can help us bond to loved ones more deeply in the future. Gratitude breeds gratitude so start 2019 by appreciating your blessings of 2018.
- We see our failures redeemed.
No one enjoys failure. It can hurt and even discourage. Often it seems unfair when we’re dealing with it. But, isn’t it beautiful to look back and see how those failures later became successes and how much you learned from your struggle? Failing one hundred times seems worth it when you finally experience the one success.
Hindsight and reflection give us that advantage. We get the more complete picture – we see the other side of the tapestry where the ugly mess-ups and hurts become the beautiful masterpiece of our lives. You will face future failures, and when you do, remember how you saw past situations redeemed. Let that prepare you for your next battle – knowing some good will come from it.
- We can identify our weaknesses.
My friend’s child has been learning about patterns in school. She is taught to watch for repeated patterns and use that information to guess what will happen next. Adults would do well to remember that skil alsol. Are there weaknesses in your life that repeatedly take you in the wrong direction or cause negative patterns in your life?
Looking back over your year can help you identify those weaknesses and patterns. And like my friend’s child, you can use that knowledge to guess what happens next. Except in our case, we use the knowledge of what happens to break the pattern and choose a different course. When we recognize our weaknesses, we take measures to avoid temptations, strengthen our weak areas, or find someone who can help us overcome those things.
- We can identify our strengths.
Every coin has two sides, right? Just as you reflected on those weaknesses, we can do the same on our strengths. What went rightin 2018? What steps can you take in the future to see the same positive outcomes? What people were beneficial to your successes and good choices? Bring those people along with you into the new year.
- We will refocus.
It’s easy to get lost in the busyness of life, going through the hustle and bustle, making decision after decision after decision. Before we know it, we can get way off course. Taking time to reflect over the past year will help you see if you’ve ended up where you hoped you would. If not, how did you get off course? What small steps can you take in 2019 to stay on track? What small goals will work you toward your big goals?
It’s hard to look back in life and not find some hurt or hang up that needs mending. If you’re struggling to move forward from something in your past, or if this year has been a particularly difficult one for you, let’s chat. Talking with a trained counselor may just be the best choice you make for succeeding in your 2019.
-Joel Walton