When to Seek Counseling?
People will often ask me, “How do I know if I need counseling?” Well, there really isn’t a simple answer to that question. In general, most people can benefit from counseling at some point in their lives. It’s not that anything is necessarily wrong with them, or they can’t handle life on their own. It’s just we all deals with issues in life, and at times all of us could benefit from sorting out things with a well-trained counselor.
The world of today is very different that it was just a few years ago. The amount of information we process today is unprecedented. It’s said that the New York Times contains more information in one daily issue than people used to process in a lifetime just a few hundred years ago. One resent study found that the average person processes 34 gigs of information each and every day. That comes out to an alarming 23 words per second! Just think about the number of tweets, Facebook posts, emails, and other data points you process in a single day.
While research shows that majority of individuals manage most of life events on their own, research has also confirms that individuals will heal faster and more completely if they receive professional help. In cases of early trauma, or other significant emotional issues, counseling is often the best way a person can mend their life.
So, while there’s no simple answer, there are four areas you may want to consider.
Do any of the following questions ring true for you?
- Are You Stuck?
While there are endless reasons people seek counseling, probably the most prevalent of them is the adage of being “stuck” and not being able to find a resolution. Feeling stuck can be incredibly frustrating, but on the other hand, it’s the intense frustration that helps you decide to make a change. Working with a counselor when you feel stuck can help you process your options and look at what needs to change in order to move you to a better place in your life.
- Are You Overwhelmed?
Feeling overwhelmed is another common reason people seek counseling. Being overwhelmed with emotions and unable to sort through them can make a person feel disoriented. Worse, it can make a person feel like they’re losing their mind. A counselor helps you filter and process emotions and navigate the necessary changes that will reduce the overwhelm.
- Are You Out of Control?
Being out of control with unhealthy behaviors is a definite reason to seek counseling. This includes substance abuse, excessive gambling, eating disorders, or any habitual behavior you’re not fully able to control. Any self-sabotaging behavior that is placing significant stress on your personal, professional, physical, or spiritual life warrants professional therapy. There is a wide range of treatment options available to match almost any situation.
- Are You Thinking of Ending It?
Besides the obvious issues related to suicidal thoughts, people can also be thinking obsessively about any sudden or drastic life change, whether it’s happened or not. This includes ending a relationship, changing jobs, or making any life transition that you haven’t fully vetted or weighed. Many times, people will make sudden, life-changing decisions without fully considering all risks, benefits, and costs. It’s okay to be upset, but impulsively deciding to end relationships may not serve you best in the long run. Learning how to set healthy limits and finding your voice can go a long way in solving problems rather than simply avoiding them.
In Summary
Counseling is often the one place where people feel safe enough to be truly honest with themselves and their feelings. For some, counseling may be the first time they’ve ever stopped hiding behind a self-protective façade and let go of the defenses that are holding them back.
Counseling is a place of learning. It can provide the tools to help mend a relationship or receive deeper understanding of your partner’s perspective. Counseling helps to deepen your ability to attune and resolve longstanding conflicts, find trust, and finally gain healing.
Finding a good counselor can go a long way towards helping you sort through your thoughts, feelings, and emotions when facing changes or transitions. Understandably, your friends and family generally have their own agendas and will often try to push you toward their way of thinking. They rarely have the resources to help you explore what’s right for you in the long term. Being able to verbalize your internal world can be a powerful experience, helping you solidify your thoughts and bring new clarity and options to light.
One of the reasons I offer a short, complimentary first visit is that I realize many people may be afraid of counseling. They might be afraid of falling apart, being too dramatic, or being stigmatized by their friends should anyone find out. I pride myself on keeping all client visits strictly confidential, and I make myself available for you to get a feel for what kind of person I am and whether we would be a good match. I encourage you to find the right counselor for you and your particular needs, no matter who it turns out to be.
For more information, please contact me at (916) 587-1948; at my email, Joel.Walton@MendedLife.com.
-Joel Walton