Given you don’t live under a rock (or maybe you do…I would love to hear about that if you do), you’ve heard and read a million headlines on the CoronaVirus. We’re practicing social distancing, and shelter-in-place mandates are coming out across the country. There are a lot of questions and concerns floating around and it can be easy to react to reports and unknowns with fear.
It’s a natural reaction. I get it. But when fear is left unchecked and unbridled, it can control us. The results of fear and anxiety are not good for your mental, emotional, and physical health and they certainly are not beneficial to those around us. I’d like to explore the reasons the Covid-19 pandemic has created so much fear in Americans and ways for you to control that fear before it controls you.
Why Are Americans So Afraid Right Now?
There is incessant media coverage.
The non-stop media cycle of this pandemic leaves viewers and listeners in a hyper-vigilant state so that every new headline or story perpetuates even more fear. As we hear more stories on the Covid-19 outbreak, we become acutely of additional stories (kind of like when you get a new car and all of sudden notice all of the others cars just like it on the road in a way you didn’t before). Unfortunately, we begin to interpret the stories in a threatening way because of the mass quantity of them.
There are a lot of medical uncertainties.
While (at this point) the flu has killed more people a year than Covid-19, the flu is familiar. We hear about it every year (and many of you have likely had the flu in your lifetime) and thus have become almost desensitized to stories of flu cases. But, as doctors are learning more each day about Covid-19 – like who is most susceptible and who is carrying the virus – we’re reminded that we don’t know everything about this virus that we wish we did. Additionally, we’re being told the virus has mutated multiple times – making it seem like a health threat we cannot control. And that feels scary.
These new mandates are unfamiliar.
We don’t know what it’s like to live through shelter-in-place mandates across our country. Schools and churches and businesses have never shut down like this during our lifetimes. It’s uncharted territory for us, and the unknown is scary for most people. Furthermore, we are unsure of when these mandates will be lifted. Not having an end in sight leaves people wondering what to expect and, again, we tend to fear what we do not know. (That’s why the dark is so scary…because you don’t know what it is that you cannot see.)
How Can You Control Your Fears?
Be informed but not obsessed.
As a fan of the brain and knowledge, I encourage people to learn and understand the facts. So, have a way to check that information regularly, but then leave it at that. Scrolling news stories and getting notifications from every single news source blowing up your phone is overkill. Again, it leaves you in a hyper-sensitive state of anxiety.Â
Make sure you’re getting your facts from reliable sources and be cautious as to what you then share with others. Perhaps choose someone you trust to send you necessary updates and consider stepping away from media for a designated amount of time each day.
Recognize what you actually can control.
We’re in a bit of a social upheaval at the moment – the majority of which you have zero control over. When things feel out of control, shift your focus to those things which you do have control over. You cannot control an outbreak of positive cases in your area, but you can control your own personal risk by following the guidelines set forth by the CDC.
Wash your hands frequently with warm water for at least 20 seconds. Avoid touching your face (something hard for all you face-touchers). Stay home as much as possible. Unless it’s absolutely essential to be out, we’re being asked to stay home. You can control where you go. You can control the cleanliness of your home (woo-hoo for Lysol) and who comes in and out of your home. You can control getting plenty of good rest and eating healthy foods that support your immune system. Focusing on the things you can control will bring you a sense of stability and security – calming some of your fears.
Plan in the ways you can.
Fear creates a million “what-ifs.” What if your workplace shuts down? What if your kids don’t go back to school this semester? What if someone you love gets sick? What if you have to self-quarantine for two weeks?Â
These what-ifs can cause a lot of anxiety. I have a friend who struggles with anxiety. He plays a game he likes to call “What’s the worse that can happen?” And then he lays out all of his worst-case scenarios. Something about getting them out of his head by writing them down or speaking them out loud helps him feel free from some of his burdens. After he answers that question, he makes a plan for what will happen if that worst case does happen.
If you’re feeling anxious, write out your fears. Then, start exploring possible solutions. They don’t have to be perfect, but having some form of plan may give you a greater sense of control over those fears. It’s much better to focus on solutions rather than problems.
Stay virtually connected.
Isolation is the breeding ground for fear. Ironically, we’re being asked to isolate as much as possible. Thankfully, we live in a virtually connected world where we are merely the press of a button away from talking to (and even seeing) other people. While we cannot have human to human contact right now, we can certainly enjoy face to face contact.
Use Zoom, Facetime, Facebook Live, or other technology to reach out to others. I heard of one group of moms planning a “mom’s night in” Zoom call where they would sit in their own respective houses, drink coffee (or wine), and chat. We’re all feeling a little isolated, so get creative and intentional about connecting with other family and friends.
Help someone else.
The greatest way to control fear and other negative burdens is to shift your focus to others. Find someone you can help. I am inspired by the numerous ways I am seeing people rise up as helpers these days. Encourage a nurse or doctor. Send a thank you email to a teacher. Send an e-gift certificate to someone so they can get dinner delivered. Or maybe send an e-gift card for Amazon to someone you know in need. Film yourself reading a children’s book or teaching a math lesson and share it with a working parent whose kid may benefit from it.Â
The possibilities are endless. Be creative. Look for places to help out safely and then do it. As you’re helping others cope with these changes, you’ll find yourself stronger and less fearful – perhaps even hopeful!
If this Covid-19 pandemic has surfaced severe anxiety for you and you’re struggling to function, I am offering Telehealth appointments for those who wish to take advantage of it. Solutions and help are available. Let’s learn to control your fears, break free from this covid-19 anxiety and come out of this pandemic happier and healthier!
– Joel